Creaking Bones

So I recently made a terrible decision that cost me a month of my life – I started collecting Pokémon cards again. As I wave a fond farewell to all of my money, at least I can take some comfort that my taste in video games is much, much cheaper.

So let’s talk about Pizza Frenzy Deluxe – another PopCap Games classic which was first released back in 2006. I purchased this from Steam as part of a bundle, so it only cost 42p, or roughly the price of the card below. But is this game actually worth this cost, or should I have spent the money on more shiny cardboard instead?

First Impressions

The game was off to a promising start on loading- no error messages or noticeable glitches. Is this a low bar? Maybe, but by no means a guarantee especially with older games on Steam.

The title screen has a cartoonish art style, jaunty music and three different modes available. All modes feature the same story and map progression but each focus on different game mechanics.

The options menu is fairly standard – it is nice to have the option of switching off the story mode for repeat playthroughs or if you just want to dive straight into the pizza delivery action. Its also worth considering muting the sound for higher levels. The individual effects aren’t badly designed, but they stack up when multiple orders come in and can definitely feel overwhelming at times.

Premise

The story follows a struggling pizzeria being run by the Stromboli family. Now, I’ve watched enough Kitchen Nightmares to be able to diagnose some fairly obvious problems holding this business back. For starters, each store location can only to sell a single topping pizza, featuring highly questionable options including banana, ice cube, and most heinous of all- olive.

However, instead of focusing on improving the food quality, adding new menu choices and shouting obscenities at management, the game takes a very different approach to saving this business. The goal is to match the orders to the correct location and collect as many tips as possible from grateful customers who just couldn’t live without chocolate pizza.

Different callers have different effects on the game. The gossip will cause others to change to the same order, while the celebrity will expect their delivery ASAP. Bankers will helpfully collect the tips for you while the monk has the power to slow down time. There are also a variety of criminals to deal with – thieves, vandals and pranksters will all try to ruin your day. Rather than delivering to these individuals you’ll need to involve the police, though unfortunately there’s no option to report the clown.

Modes

The first mode is focused on speed- how many orders can you fulfil accurately within the time limit. Meeting 5 of the same orders in a row results in the eponymous ‘Pizza Frenzy’ being shouted in a joyous accent with Mario-levels of authenticity. Achieving these combos unlocks upgrades for your toppings, allowing for multiple deliveries to be fulfilled at the same time which becomes more important as the levels progress.

Achieving 100% of deliveries unleashes the pizza blimp, which drop bags of bonus cash. The physics of this become questionable when you leave the confines of Earth and expand the business to the moon and beyond (If anyone can explain what would happen to a blimp on mars, please let me know).

In between maps there’s an occasional mini game which asks you to spot the difference and recreate pizzas within the time limit. As well as the default patterns you can create your own sins against nature using the customise options accessed from the main menu.

The other gameplay modes keeps the same level designs and story but switches up the goals. In Memory mode, the customer orders are only briefly visible and your job is to remember the correct topping for each. For Simon Says deliveries need to be made in the same order as they are called in.

Being terminally goldfish brained, I found both of these much harder at the higher levels. Its also a shame that the Pizza Frenzy combos and the time based characters like the celebrity and monk have no changes to keep them relevant. Overall, while functional these modes felt like an afterthought, but still might be a good option for players who struggle with the more reflex heavy speed mode.

Conclusion

Is Pizza Frenzy Deluxe a story based game that threw all narrative cohesion out the window? Yes. Is the gameplay basic and do the alternate modes feel tacked on? Yes. Did I still play for 4 hours straight? Also yes.

For all its insanity and questionable decisions Pizza Frenzy Deluxe is a lot of fun. Its charm goes a long way, and personally I feel I got more value from playing than spending the same amount of time staring at that Pokémon card.

The game is currently available in the Steam sale for 82p (SteamDB). Outside of the sale, the price is usually £4.25 but just like Typer Shark Deluxe there’s also a free demo available so everyone has the opportunity to try it out and unleash a new wave of horrifying pizza creations on the world.